A cappella music at its finest
From Barbershop to Doo Wop
From Gospel to Patriotic
May we entertain you?
The
percentage of Choir Boys who are:
Native Iowans-75%;
Native Wisconsinites-25%;
Over 6’ tall-75%; Brothers-50%;
Happily married-80%
(Newlyweds-25%,Oldyweds-25%,Justrightyweds-50%); Singing in quartet
just to meet chicks-20%; Parents-50%;
Generation X (young & hip)-75%; AARP (broke
& hip)-25%; Hooked on phonics-17%; K-12 Music teachers-25%;
Salesmen-25%; Computer Programmers-25%; Freelance Bacon Inspector-25%;
Celine Dion fans-0%; College Graduates- 75%
(University of
Wisconsin-Whitewater Alumni-25%; Wartburg College Alumni-25%; Doane
College Alumni-25%; University of Northern Iowa Alumni-25%; Capri
College-0%; Kirkwood College Alumni-25%); “Family Guy” fans-100%;
Barbershop singers for less than 5 years- 25%; Barbershop singers for
more than 30 years-25%;
Barbershop Harmony Society members- 100%
(Dubuque Chapter-50%, Linn County
Metro Chapter-100%, Iowa City Chapter-25%); Barbershop chorus
directors-50%; Church Choir veterans-100%; Dog owners-25%; Cat
owners-50%; Allergic to bee stings-25%; Allergic to shellfish-25%;
Enrolled in Federal Witness Protection Program-25%; Frequently
gassy-41%; Central States
District Quartet Champion-25%; Attractive in tuxedos-65%;
Country music lovers-25%; Opera lovers-25%; Guitar players-25%;
Trombone players-25%; Unable to play a musical instrument but can pick
stuff up with their toes-25%; Healthy & Fit-25%; Nothing Fits-75%;
Sensitive and caring-75%; Insensitive, egocentric, and
condescending-25%; Friends-84%. Margin of Error: +/- 5%.
THE CHOIR BOYS
are Ben Knipfer, Tenor;
The Choir Boys: Now with 0% Trans Fat!